Gimme Shelter- The Rolling Stones

Everytime I hear this song I'm instantly taken back to a vibrant time in my life. It was a short period of time, but a time in my life that I think back to and laugh all the time. For a brief period of time I was fearless and the only female junior rider on the Rainbow Racing cycling team. (The team name alone makes me laugh out loud. It was not a gay and lesbian cycling team-but it should be!)

Saturdays were training days on the 7-11 Velodrome. Music playing loudly on the PA. The only song I ever remember hearing was Gimme Shelter. At the beginning of the song I see myself gliding out of the mid and onto the track. I can smell the heat radiating off the concrete. I would take a couple warm up laps and just as the song gets going so would my legs. I would embrace my inner Nelson Vails and beat the shit out of my track bike. I wanted to kick the ass of every boy I raced against- My own teammates who didn't take kindly to a female in the team pursuit.

It's amazing the number of visual and olfactory memories this song activates.

I hold this song close to my heart as a song of strength and determination. A musical mantra I play for myself any time the going gets tough; whenever I need reminding of my inner strength and power.

I may no longer be a cyclist, but I am still an athlete and when I pound the pavement this is the first song on my workout playlist.

My New Favorite Music Playlist (#5)

1. World Sick- Broken Social Scene
2. Excuses- The Morning Benders
3. New York Is Killing Me- Gil Scott-Heron
4. Yellow Wings- Keepaway
5. What Would I Want- Animal Collective
6. Sheila-Atlas Sound
7. Hope Child- Free Energy
8. A More Perfect Union- Titus Andronicus
9. I Will Live On Islands- Josh Rouse
10. Do The Method- Method Actors

Playlist #4 (The I'm Ready For Summer List)

1. O Shot- The Gay Blades
2. Ghetto Love- Spinnerette
3. Vapors- Islands
4. Up To No Good- Rancid
5. For Our Elegant Castle- Of Montreal
6. Two Weeks- Grizzly Bear
7. Y Control- Yeah Yeah Yeahs
8. Time To Pretend- MGMT
9. Lisztomania- Phoenix
10. Go!- Tones On Tail

Things that people shouldn't admit...

They like John Mayer


...just sayin'.

Playlist #3

1. Neverends- Vijay Kishore
2. The Ark- Dr. Dog
3. The Swimmer- Sleater-Kinney
4. Death to the Storm- Joe Henry
5. Happiest Times- Little Big Adventure
6. All the Wine- The National
7. Better To Be- Liam Finn
8. Red Eyes and Tear- Black Rebel Motorcycle Club
9.Run Chicken Run- The Felice Brothers
10. Magpie to the Morning- Neko Case (*sigh, big girl crush going strong for 6 years now)

Playlist #2

1. Babys- Bon Iver
2.Muzzle of Bees- Wilco
3. The High Road- Broken Bells
4. Little Shadow- Yeah Yeah Yeahs
5. I've Got Your Number - Passion Pit
6. As I Sat Sadly By Her Side- Nick Cave
7. Call It a Day- The Raconteurs
8. A Few Honest Words- Ben Sollee
9. It Don't Move Me- Peter Bjorn and John
10. Ain't No Rest For the Wicked- Cage the Elephant

Playlist #1

1. Corner- Allie Moss
2. Wages of Sin- Damien Jurado & Rosie Thomas
3. Mushaboom- Feist
4. Melody- Kate Earl
5. Set Free- Katie Gray
6. Lille- Lisa Hannigan
7. The Hill- Marketa Irglova
8. Gimmie Sympathy- Metric
9. Let Him Fly- Patty Griffin
10. Skinny Love- Bon Iver

Feeling pretty melancholy...

On Repeat

Sometimes I get stuck on a song and have to listen to it over and over again. I've done this since I was a kid. There is always some song that I can't get enough of.

Today it is Melody by Kate Earl

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5z3hDkkiIA

Such a simple song. The video actually makes me want to puke, but the message of the songs gets to the 13 year still alive and kicking on the inside.

Music, my only friend for a large chunk of my isolated life. Ha! I think this song speaks to that.

Mixtape

To me the concept of a mixtape brings so many memories to the surface. Young, hopeful memories. Memories that remind me of my childhood, my adolescence, my young adult life. I haven't made a 'mixtape' in years. I only have one cassette player now and it doesn't record. I do however, have a large collection of mixtapes that I haven't seen in years. They reside at my parents house. Every once and a while I pull them out, pop one in, and I am instantly returned to a time in my life that was magical. Just listening to one of my mixtapes I pull out every thought and emotion I was experiencing during the time I created it.

It's imprinted. The power exists at a cellular level. It's cellular memory. It's powerful

One of my favorite activities to do with kids in therapy or group is have them make a mix. I learn so much more about a person when I ask them to make me a mix. I know how deep or shallow their work is. I get a better sense of how they are feeling. I can tell when they put a lot of thought into it and when they just slap some shit together. To me, that speaks volumes about our therapuetic relationship.

The exchange of a mix is like a dance. It's the best way I know how to gauge a relationship. Does this person get as excited as I do? Does it get tossed in a glove box and never listened to? Does it get played over and over as the listener deconstructs it?

Power. Mighty power.